Moms Talk Q&A
The Pasadena Patch Moms Council answers your questions in this weekly column.
Welcome to Moms Talk Q&A! This week's question:
My 4-year-old son will only listen to his uncle when it comes to discipline instead of me. How can I change this?
Well, this could be tricky because at 4, children have a tendency to gravitate towards who they feel most comfortable with. This is not to say that your child is not comfortable with you, however maybe there's just something about his uncle that makes him feel strongly about him. I would recommend working with the uncle who could inevitably be the one who could convince your son that "Mommy knows best" when it comes to certain things. Don't take offense to it, instead embrace the fact that your son has found another adult that he can trust and look up to.
I am wondering if you are giving in to your son after you discipline him. So, he knows he can get away with things with you. Make sure after you discipline him you stick to the discipline and don't give in. He probably knows what his uncle says, goes. Don’t worry! I struggle with this also with my daughter. It's hard not giving into her at times. Have your son's uncle reiterate how important it is to listen to you. Hope this helps.
I would also have to question whether or not you are giving in to your son. Children need consistency and boundaries, so I cannot stress enough the importance of following through with what you say you will do to your son if he disobeys. If you want him to take you seriously, you have to come through with the consequences you outline for him. I realize it is easy to give in to our kids, but in the end, children crave those boundaries. Decide what the consequences will be for your son's disobedience and follow through with them. It may be difficult at first, but once you see the results you are getting, you'll find the willpower to continue.